Nine Quid...

28 Jun 2003

Everything in these markets seems to be nine quid. I went and got a bacon bap and a cup of coffee today and it cost me nine quid. Yesterday - baccy and rizla, nine quid again. I'm not sure how this works. My pockets are chock full of pound coins and it's making walking around a bit of a chore, not to mention making me sound like a morris dancer.

Visiting the Dance Tent to see Mint Royale, I get stung at one of the water stalls. Nine quid for a bottle of water. Mooching back into the Dance Tent to check out the self-styled sexiest men in Jamaica I am struck by how quiet it is. Chatting away to people down the front it's not even necessary to raise our voices. I'm eventually persuaded to go and have a word with someone. Collaring one of the engineers at the mixing tower I ask if anything can be done. It can, I'm told, if I pay the princely sum of nine quid. Later, out of here.

A few hours down the road after my wife arrives and we have consumed volumes of alcohol, it seems the most natural thing in the world to go and see Detroit's new wild men (or bunch) of rock. Yes, Electric Six are on the Other Stage and they want to take me to a Gay Bar, apparently. A truly entertaining performance, although I swear that after the line 'Do You Have Any Money?' is sung, a lone voice calls out 'Nine quid...' from somewhere far off.

A few hours later we find ourselves in front of the Pyramid for REM's set. Red-Stripe isn't wearing a dress this year, to my wife's disappointment. I tell her she's living in a fantasy world and that he'd be more likely to fancy me but she's insistent that I go for the circa 99 appearance of a sarong and a baby pink skinnyrib tshirt. I eventually find a stall that has some. Nine quid. Bugger this, I'm orf.

Next year I'm going to print special Glastonbury 9 quid notes with Michael Eavis' face on them...

Stalker eventually managed to buy a can of 'Skol' beer for a pound from some crusty bloke...

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